Apart from „still having feelings for you“, „wanting absolution“ and „safety net in case things don’t work out with OW“ (which are probably all true) a fourth possibility for “wanting to stay friends” and not filing just occured to me – keeping OW in limbo. After all, what better way to keep her attentive and “on her toes” relationship-wise so to speak than to say “You know, I’ve just had a talk with my wife today. She still very much wants to make the marriage work. I can’t bear the idea of hurting her by filing right now – she couldn’t deal with it.”
If he were to actually file he would have to, heaven forbid, discuss commitment and marriage with OW – without the convenient “exit” back into his old marriage if things don’t go his way.
