Betsey, So how long are you going to beat yourself up for what you have done?
It is ok to forgive yourself even if Mr.Wonderful never does.
Once you have forgiven yourself you can release it.
Have you tried to make ammends for what you have done.From where I sit yes you have.And I believe you have gone far and beyond what is required.
While you can't change the past you can resolve to not make the same mistakes agian.
Girl your on the right track even if Mr.Wonderful is on a different train.Someday he might just jump on board.
Whatever your past it does not define you.
You are not your actions.
I think that you are doing a wonderful job trying to fix the things you have done.
And you know I wouldn't say these just things to make you feel better.Since this board isn't about making someone feel better but to learn from our mistakes and sometimes that does not feel so damn good.
Examining ones heart is sometimes going to be the hardest and dirtiest thing your going to do.
What your wanting the OM to feel is the same pain your feeling.Yes it does feel like he is getting of scott free but is he really?
Your such a wonderful person now and you have come sucha long way.
Your more than you used to be and you continue to grow.
Just when you think you may have gotten it something else pops up for you to catch.
I'm sorry your having a hard time.
Maybe it is time for you to look out for yourself for a while.
In time you will be happy.
Since nothing is forever this won't be your life forever.
I respect you for you willingness to learn from your mistakes and for trying to make up for them.
Wouldn't it be great if my H and others WA's would do the same.
Your a wonderful person and dont' you forget it.
Later Friend. Love, Briget
P.S. Pamela I'm so glad to see you post.I sure have missed you.I hope you plan on comeing around more.
The grass is always greener over the septic tank... Erma Bombeck
Treat hate with Love... DR. Martin Luther King
