Hi HP... I can relate to your situation. I am in a place now where I can accept H's "head" a little better...that he has psych obstacles to overcome in order to ML, and have given up the fantasy that he has a burning need for me. He can better see his own stuff as well; he now knows that he was acting defensive and withholding, and pushes through that a bit better. The end result is that I am walking this tightrope between accepting where he's at versus having expectations from him, and lately we have had a good balance of things. I gave him some room to show his repsonsibility towards the marriage, and he spontaneously initiated ML last night...this enables me to wait it out til date night. The sex was pretty hot for us( more aggressive elements) and I am seeing he is trying in his way to make things work. Is it passionate, clothes ripping off nightly spontaneous sex? Hardly. But I am working with who he is and at the same time I am asserting what I need, and he's stepping up. J--- 4 days til date nite
