Azure, How are things? Any word on BIL? Sending you good wishes. Sorry it has to be this way. Perhaps H will see something in you through this difficulty. Sometimes bad things are sent our way to help. Hope so! Ron
My new goal #1. Find happiness and hold onto it. Forget everything else. It doesn't matter. (Happiness helpers: Respect, Friendship, Humor, Music, Passionate Sex)
Hello dear friends, Nothing new to report. It feels strange to even post on this thread, as it hardly seems appropriate to be "DBing." But it is a surreal situation. And sometimes it is hard to know exactly how to be when, as far as I know, our D could be final any day. H does seem to need me for emotional support, so when I get confused about boundaries, I just try to think, "What would I offer to a good friend?" and let that guide my behavior. I just feel so bad for all of them. It does not look good. H said to me on the phone two nights ago, "I feel like I'm in a movie. How do I think to myself that it's going to be part of my life story that my brother committed suicide? It's just unreal."
I have been urging that they hire a private investigator, at least for a short time. The area BIL lives in is so rural, the law does not have time to devote to this, especially with no note or anything.
Ugh.
Thank you all for your continued prayers and thoughts.
Azure, Sometimes you need to follow your heart and instead of your head on these things. Being there for your H now is the best thing that you can be doing. Hugs to you. Ron
My new goal #1. Find happiness and hold onto it. Forget everything else. It doesn't matter. (Happiness helpers: Respect, Friendship, Humor, Music, Passionate Sex)
And thanks for the great insight on my little bout of analysis paralysis.