Tuesday night H spent most of the evening with the guy purchasing H’s boat AT OW’s Well he wasn’t there the whole night, the guy wanted to take the boat out on the lake for a ride, once H got the boat out of the water and since he had it hooked up to his truck, guy wanted H to haul the boat to the his house. Which to me means, they stopped at OW’s to pick up guys car and headed to guys house and then H came home. H also had a copy of an email from a CJ who works with OW, some fishing info for this weekend. It was laying on the counter and asked H who "CJ" was and he told me, works with OW and liked to fish. The same CJ who we ran into a few weeks ago at a park, he was there is two girls and H, S and I were together. He's the one who looked tentative about approaching H as I was with him.
H did call on his way home though and said to me “called to let you know I haven’t forgotten about you guys” and then told me the above!
Yesterday I pained S’s room! S’s room was a bright blue and I had to prime it and then paint it. Yikes! My roller broke at one point..cheap thing. So I had to run out and buy a new one, if this one broke I was going to write a letter and get my money back! But the room is done and it looks really good..well okay good. Good enough until I paint it again.
H was working on his fishing stuff most of the evening which meant S was wanting to help me paint. I did give him a little job to do. At one point I went out to H and asked him if he had anything for S to do out there, with a little smile on my face. H said "no" with a look of horror.
Since I was alone most of the day had a lot of thoughts flying through my mind. I keep going back to when this all started and before H moved back home, opening Pandora’s box again. But, it doesn’t feel like Pandora’s box, it’s not as awful. All the emotions aren’t there, some are, but not all and they’re different. I don’t know if this is normal, but I can’t stop myself. Maybe I have to do this to shut the door and move on, another step in the process.
I've also been looking at the time since I met H and going back through our history, without all the emotion, as a vistor to our story. I'm getting a whole new perspective.
Interactions with H have been great, it's like there isn't an OW involved, "a past" we're just a family. At one point during the evening, H came into the house and called my name. I went to see what he wanted and he was walking towards me. Usually my H just says my name and it’s my clue that I go to him. While he was working on his boat, a person stopped and asked him if we wanted to sell our house? I said no they didn’t. H said yes, the man was looking for a house to buy for his son and he liked the location of our lot, cul de sac, lots of trees, large lot and quiet, yet close to the city. I said what did you tell him and H said no we’re not selling it.
When we were out to eat last Friday we were seated next a to a table with three older couples, older than us even! And when they got up to leave they complimented us on how well behaved our S was. H said he saw the man watching S most of the evening and smiling.
Son’s room is painted! Yippee!! I’m golfing with my friend P this afternoon and the sun is out and it’s going to be a fantastic day!
