Okay, you sound like you could use some time alone, to calm down. You're really letting yourself get sucked in here. I know you know all of this, but I'm going to tell you anyway, because I think you need to hear it right now.
1. Stop obsessing about OW. You're getting caught up in that drama again.
2. You're pushing H for the emotional reconnection. It's not going to happen instantly. He's not just going to wake up and see OW for what she is. Stop pushing, stop pressuring. Let it happen naturally.
3. Act "as if" your H is completely recommitted. He decided to stick through it with you. Whatever his reasons are right now, they might change tomorrow. That's normal. He's on a real emotional ride right now, and you need to be his support for the moment.
4. If you need reassurance, ask for it, but stop the accusations of "you lied" and "you still want her." These are going to push him away from you. Just tell him you're feeling a little hurt, and could use a hug. And especially stop waving it in his face with things like the pictures!
5. Realize that these are your feelings, and that's okay. It's perfectly normal to feel what you are feeling--but it's how you act that's important.
Maybe reread the DR section on infidelity again. Do something for your PMA. Get away from your sitch for awhile.
Quote: I told him again I want us to work and I believe we can build a great M, he said he thought so too.
There's your answer. Now, repeat it over and over in your head. Read that part of your post.
And stop trying to dig up evidence that he's still interesting in being with OW! You're crazymaking.
Okay, now that I've reminded you of all the things you already know... {{{{debcb}}}} Stick with it, remember to stay calm, and you'll be fine. Do something to pamper yourself today. Go to a spa or get a new outfit. And remember to smile! You have your H!
