The simple fact remains that no matter what this m gets put on hold over and over again.
put on hold in that it is expected (by h) that the m with survive and thrive whilst h puts all of his time and energy into his business for months at a time leaving little if nothing for us.
resentment builds when time is not made.
It is not that I don't love h, it is not that I don't like h, it is not that we can conversate and enjoy eachothers company...it is that we don't share awake, alert converstaion (and not just..did you pick up the new lock etc) often enough...it's a catch as catch can type of thing. All I have wanted is set asside weekly time that is for us and h has been unwilling to give it no matter what I do.
Is our m not worth one night a week?
am I not worth one night a week?
(you can bash me for the next statment) If h was able to take time out of his day to have lunch with ow why is it that he can't call me to come down and meet him for lunch once a week?
I just wish that h knew how lost I feel. It seems no matter how I try or don't try to express myself I get nowhere.
Tongight h and I did spend about 10 min sitting on the front porch...I wasn't invited but joined him anyway...it was nice...him talking...of course when it came time for my talking he went inside so I had to talk through the screen. I don't ask for much if we made a habit out of sitting for 10-15 min one or two nights a week maybe that would be enough to stay connected but h can't/wont give it...it's always just a fly by...maybe it'll happen maybe it wont...I don't recall the last time we actually sat and chatted and I don't know when it will happen again.
LL who should clarify the mis spell in the thread title...it should read "trust, what's love got to do with it?"
