CeMar, Well that's NOT what you said the first time around but who cares.
I happen to agree with every single word you wrote this time. You deserve to have that kind of marriage, as we all do.
That is why I will not settle for less. I did for many years and I am no longer willing to do that. I stand my ground in a loving way, but it is firm ground. He knows exactly how I feel, and what the stakes are, should he decide that he doesn't want to participate any longer.
That is the difference here. You must sit her down and have a talk with her.
Here is my suspicion: You don't want to talk to your wife because you are scared sh*tless to have the following conversation with her: Wife if nothing changes, I will have to leave. You are scared that she will say, Fine then leave, and in essence force your hand and you will be packing your bags before you know what hit ya.
But don't you think you could POSSIBLY be underestimating your wife and her love for you? How do you KNOW what her reaction will be? YOU DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Even if she does say, Fine leave, you are under no obligation to pack your bags right then. You can do it on your own time, at your own leisure. Take 10 years if you feel you want to be there for your sons.
But for goodness' sakes, lay it out on the line for her. I would bet that a good portion of your anger is actually anger at yourSELF due to your inability to confront the situation head on.
I know that with my situation I was very very mad at myself for a long time, for allowing things to develop as they had. I was mad as hell at HIM also but more mad at selling myself out and going along with his nonsense.
I feel for you; hope you are able to talk to her soon.
