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OK, my two cents. I think many of you are jumping CeMar's case for just stating -- in plain English -- what a lot of us THINK, but are always so damned careful to couch in more politically-correct language.


Buzzzzzz. Wrong.

I've been accused of many things, but NOBODY has EVER accused me of being politically correct. I agree that in all probability, unless they can determine why his formerly HDW is now LD and address those issues, and unless he decides to bail out, CeMar WILL have to settle for something less than he wants. But if she was HD at one time, it's by no means a foregone conclusion that she can't/won't be again. I repeat, there are REASONS.
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...it is the CHANGE in his wife that has him angry and frustrated. It's the ol' "bait-and-switch," quite simply he does not feel like THIS IS THE WOMAN HE MARRIED.


Again, I have to disagree. I can't argue that he may FEEL that way, but I simply can't believe that his W was LD all along and used sex as the "ol' bait-and-switch" to lure him in and then return to her LD ways. Why would anyone, man or woman, want to enter into something as serious as M under false pretenses (unless CeMar is like a multi-millionaire or something ) It may be that there are other issues in her life that are killing the desire. Maybe she's just experiencing a decline in hormone production. Maybe she feels that he only wants her for sex. Who knows? My point is that there are REASONS why she went from HD to LD. To say that she's not meeting his needs without exploring what has changed seems very one-sided to me. And assuming that she went into the M KNOWING that that was the situation seems incomprehensible.
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I'm in advertising -- if you're LD/ND, that's fine -- just let me know before I marry you. I may or may not still marry you, but don't you think I deserve to know that, IF MY PRIMARY LOVE LANGUAGE is physical touch and affection???


Yes, assuming that she was LD at the time you married and was aware of that fact along with the fact that your primary love language was physical touch. As I have read CeMar's posts, that doesn't appear to be the case. Did he not say that she used to be HD? I repeat, there must be one or more reasons for the change. Rather than saying that she's simply not meeting his needs, rather than saying that an HDH and an LDW are totally incompatible, rather than saying it's inevitable that he'll either have to move on or settle for less, how about exploring those reasons and trying to address them. It IS possible that he's right. It IS possible that her current LD is just "the way things are". But the tone of what he says seems to be saying that that's the way it is and that that's all there is to it. I don't agree. They were happy and compatible once; they can be again.

WB