I had hoped that my last post would be just that, the last post in this story. However, I just learned that my wife has initiated contact with OM again after over one month. In this email to him she goes on to say that time has not helped her, and she still feels no more love for her husband (me) and she still thinks of him often. She tells him that we have not kissed in months and that she is "going without." Then she proposes that the two of them have a quick get-away vacation together before he leaves the country forever, and asks him to imagine the state of readiness she'll be in if they are alone together after having had no intimacy for months.
Over the last month I have been trying to practice DB principles, but don't know that I've been doing that well. Obviously my W doesn't feel any differently towards me, though she tells all her friends how kind and patient I have been and that she still wants me in her life, but as a brother-type person.
I guess the thing to do is to get back to basics with DBing. I realize that I do need to spend more time working on my own development. I have spent too much time catering to her needs and pussyfooting around her hoping to make her happy. Obviously it's not working, so a change of strategy is in order.
Of course, any more advice or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks.
