The scene now is much as it has been for the last week. My wife still wants to live with me as a roommate (where I do lots of work, errands and childcare, help and support her as I normally would... but don't expect sex), and she still wants to be with OM twice a year on vacations.
The current problem is that she is still in contact with him via email. They are both away on vacations right now (not together), but when they return next week I suspect that she will start seeing him again and probably take their EA to a physical level. How am I supposed to live with that?
My question is, should I continue to agree to live as roommates and allow her to have this affair... to have her cake and eat it too? Or, should I leave. This might be better for my mental health, and it would allow her to see what life without me is like. If I do leave, I would leave the country entirely, making it impossible for us to see each other or for me to see my young children. Also, the OM is leaving the country in a few months anyway. So, she would be here alone without either of us.
Does anybody see the merit in staying living as roommates? She does claim she is feeling more affection and closeness with me... yet she is also telling OM how much she wants to be with him. If I stay, and he is out of the country, that might be good, though they would still be in contact via email.
