Thanks for replying to my posted message, I called the dating service because that particular weekend I felt lonely. (Probably that's not a very good excuse). I have confronted my H and he says he understands and is willing to try to do things differently. It feels to me like its a little too late. I am very bitter about all the struggles and battles that we have had. I cannot seem to trust him, or trust that he has my best interest at heart. I am sure it will be better to make the marriage work but I am having difficulty in finding the courage, energy and spirit to actively work at the marriage. (That probably sounds pathetic). Its been a though 9 years, I suppose my spirit is tired. I think what I am looking for is a male friend, not someone to have an intimate relationship with, but someone to have good conversation with, maybe its just male attention I want. (Again that sounds somewhat pathetic).
I think I should find some time to really search my mind and heart for what to do, I know I am desperately unhappy, I am just stuck on what to do. I want the very best for the kids, if I tried I am sure I could get through some more years of this and then be free to make myself a better life. You say you are in the same boat, are things getting any better for you?. How long have you been married?.
