I believe DR will help answer some of these questions for you--in addition to giving you the steps on turning this boat around. While this BB is great for moral support, DR and DB are the principles we work with. Can you print out the first chapter here to get started?
In a nutshell, now that you've opened up to your H with the truth, you are going to have to let him process what you've told him and deal with the information on his own timeline. That means you have to be patient with him AND yourself.
We humans are animals, C&S. Some of us have to run and hide to deal with the hurt. Let him figure this out on his own and he will ask you questions when he's good and ready for your answers. You and he have some hurdles to cross, and you're going to have to be as patient with him as he appears to be with you.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsey 
