BF and I signed the lease for the new apt. today - we are planning to move in around the middle of next month. We were laying around a bit, and I did bring up something that had really been bothering me all week. I really try not to bring up feelings and such too much of things that happened last year - because he has apologized and it doesn't seem fair to do so. But what was really on my mind this past week was how when I'd first asked him not to tell ex-OW about us, he did anyway. And he (for some reason) thought she didn't have a big mouth - but she did. So my personal life was also passed on to others that she was friends with in our group.
I told him I can't have that again. I don't want him discussing our R with anyone #1 who will benefit from us being split up. Or #2 anyone that he is attracted to. The one thing I did right during the end of my marriage was that I didn't discuss my marriage problems with any guys online (or in person) who I found attractive. I screwed up on a lot of things, but that was one that I was really adamant about.
It actually turned into like a 20 minute discussion (which it never was meant to). He brought something up, and then I had questions, etc. I need to cut the questions out though, I think that I know more than I ever wanted to - and it's time to really move forward. I did tell him I'd looked at her website to see when she was getting married - and that I'd noticed stuff that I hadn't seen before (like that essentially their trip was a dream vacation). He did say they fought during it, that she was bi!chy and particular. I don't understand what the attraction was then, and why they'd have filled anything out for her to come here. I don't think he really knows now either. He did give me a number of instances when she'd been b!tchy about something, and I just know that he hates stuff like that. Why he let her do it and still wanted to be around her is beyond me.
I do get really angry still sometimes. I know that the best revenge is just being happy and moving on. I think that ex-OW will be pissed at some point because she won't have him to fall back on. I said that to BF and he said it wasn't his problem anymore.
I think this was the first talk in like 6 weeks like this, so I'm doing good at not bringing things up. I did say that I wanted to go to England and France and such, to make it ours - and he seemed good with that idea and even had suggestions on where to go (and what I'd enjoy). I just hope it's pretty soon.
So...I think that is about it. I did two volunteer shifts this week, and have been working out a lot. I think moving also will be great for us - just a very fresh start. New surroundings, new friends, new everything. We are on the lease together, not me being just someone who moves in. The group online that we are part of, he isn't as interested in it anymore. So we'll gravitate a bit away from that and towards other things.
I found a kitten a few days ago, that has been occupying some of my time too. It is cute, I haven't found signs up anywhere looking for it. It was outside meowing, I called BF and asked what I should do. He said that I should bring it in (which is what I thought, I didn't want to have it hit by a car or anything) and we'll keep it if noone claims it.
