I think the PM book has stirred up high expectations for the M which can be damaging, especially when you're the only one in the marriage reading the book!
ALERT, ALERT!!!!!!! YOU ARE MISSING SOMETHING.
IJ, The big changes happened when I read the book, contemplated my strategy, and executed. It required no reading from my W. I got excellent results as the sex, intimacy, and frequency got really good. Now I'm in a whole new phase of the relationship where I have to do it again to bring real "desire" back.
Asking your spouse to read it violates the most important principal in the book.
As a matter of fact, I sent her a copy of the book and the C and I both recommended that she read it. I tried to have "reviews" of it with her to ensure that she was reading it. After a few weeks, I realized that she doesn't need to read it at all...if she wants these types of changes in her life and in the R, she will read it. Otherwise, she doesn't have to.
PM is completely about standing up for yourself and what you want in the marriage. Granted, it's a tricky path to walk and requires lots of preliminary groundwork, but it really works if you "understand" it. If you don't, then keep asking questions here and let a few of us take turns trying to help you through the concepts and what types of dialogs will ensue when you put it into action.
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
