Saturday H came over to take s bike riding and to wash a load of clothes. He picked up the mail on his way in the house. He opened something addressed to S. It was a magazine script. I said, why did you open S's mail? He said, well it had his name on it and the payment is late! WHAT ARE TRYING TO DO? MESS UP HIS CREDIT!!!!!!!! I said, you know what, I don't want to argue with you and I left it alone.
It is so anoying that he hopes and prays for something to complain about. I know that paying the utilities on time was a sore spot for him. I am making so many changes in so many areas of my life. I can't make them all at the same time. I don't appreciate him noticing nothing good, but complaining about everything, no matter how small! He doesn't have a lot to complain about anymore, but he sure can run with the smallest thing(like he did with a messy car trunk?!) Do they honestly not see the changes? Are they just so angry that changes are taking place that they have to find something wrong with you to divert them from thinking of their responsibiliy in the R ?
The other thing that concerns me is that we have never really had an R talk about what actually what wrong and why. The only time we had R talks, his response is let's D! At 1st he was confused . Then he wanted a D. It has been for months and he hasn't talked about D, but he has not mentioned reconciliation either. Do they actually talk about reconciliation or does it just somehow start to happen? It has been 6 mos and he still doesn't want o do things together as a family. Why? We are still the parents of S! My yheory is he is afrid that will make him feel connected or that will give me false hope. I know ASSUMING!!!!!!!
On a more positive note, my brother's W had her baby shower Saturday. H was there. It was very important to him to get an invitation. My in-laws were there as well. He had a really good time. It is so nice to see how connected he still feels to the family. My neices and nephews love him. He loves my siblings and he keeps in contact w/them.My in-laws absolutely love my siblings. The thing that pisses me off is that he treats my family so warm and me soo cold at times.
