Quote: I'm just thinking that it sounds like your main issue is wanting to be WANTED, and CHOSEN, and not feeling like you're getting those. So you would need to dialog with him about that, and let him know you expect him to show you these things.
That is exactly right. Being wanted and chosen sexually is the main thing that makes me feel like I'm his wife or mate. Otherwise, I just feel like a good friend or an appreciated housekeeper or respected business partner etc. I don't know how to get into or out of this second crucible now that I've dealt with the frequency issue as the first.
Things are a lot better! Maybe I won't have to deal with this issue directly if he continues to initiate fairly regularly. It's just harder for me to define what would constitute unacceptable "mercy" sex since my H is a man. Can men actually do "mercy" sex and how would I know if he was?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
