Divorce busted, Crisis over, love waiting in wings

[MissingMyHubby]

Hi Rottzilla;

one of these days I'll be joining you with news of hubby watching the videos & enjoying the idea of working on the marriage

but for now I'm happily (ok not happily but ok with) waiting in LimboLand
reading your success stories as they happen
keep posting good news for me to read

[sage]

New revelation, when things are going well, don't remind them of why they were bad. I think he honestly forgot that he doesn't "feel the in-love" feelings anymore. It's almost as if it wasn't a priority, and now I've reminded him of it.

This is such a great insight and reminder! It's one of the reasons (I think) why R talks that focus on the negative (and I can be the queen of them!) can really result in a backslide.

Thanks for the prompt!

Sage

[nitaf]

Rotts, you are doing great.

Nitaf

[suzyblue]

Great thinking!!!!! I'm so happy that you have both made the decision to put the past EM in th past and LEAVE IT THERE!!!! I think this is such a major contributer to getting back on the right track and staying there. I think that is part of my ex problem, the counselor said that he doesn't think of me "as a wife" anymore, but yet he still loves and spends all hi time with me. but hey thats my stitch!!! again I am so happy for you!!!!!!! I have been biking alot myself but not loosing any weight, but I think my legs are getting bigger, well my calves are, don't know if tht is good or bad.

[nitaf]

I wish my H would make the Decision to move forward, instead of letting his Feelings dictate his actions.

Nitaf

[BoldNBeautiful]

Hi Rotz, great news! And thanks for pointing out that they shouldnt be reminded of why they were bad in the first place.

Crossing my finger for similar sitch for me soon.

[slowly]

page 3??? time for a bump. hope you are having fun, rottz

[rottzilla]

Hey slowly, thanks. I've been so focused on losing weight that I have not been on the boards lately.

Things are pretty much the same between H and I. No more kisses, but I feel he is reattaching to me. I'll keep you all posted when and if I get any more insights into why and how it is happening.

Love you all. Good luck, and keep up your PMA.

[nitaf]

Luv ya back!!!!!!

Nitaf

[rottzilla]

Hey all, just posting to let you know I am still around. Haven't had time lately to read or post, but here I am now.

H is still "with" me, meaning he is there, present, and listening to me whenever I speak. He is really truly trying, but the "feelings" for me still aren't there. He won't say ILY still, and kisses on the lips are few and very far between. Although hand holding is getting closer and closer.

So, we continue to trudge along. He is smart and educated and knows now what caused the EA with OW and has proven that he will never do it again. She called the other night and left him a voice mail while I was next to him. He deleted it without listening, and then went to work the next day and told her not to talk to him anymore. Then came home and told me he did it.

No secrets between us anymore. I feel so good about that.

I did see her phone number and had the urge to call her and ask if he told the whole truth about it only being an EA. But, what would that do besides putting us right back at the beginning?

Anyway, patience is the key, keep trudging y'all.