Quote:

I think that I get anxious in my M (or when I am close to or "attached" to a man) because I shift not only my focus from myself to him, but b/c I shift the responsibility for my feeling good from myself to him.



The above is so true of me! I think this is why I have such a hard time sometimes when he is spending a lot of time at home, because my focus shifts, and sometimes I don't even realize it.
Your ideas are wonderful - I will have to think about the book club idea - it may have to wait until I relocate, but I honestly never thought of starting one on my own! What a cool idea! I guess if my house wouldn't work for the meetings, I could look into other options...

what a cool thought! and what a wonderful, gentle way to remind me that I am only responsible for my feelings...thanks!

A quick weekend update:
Friday Night:
Had my IC appt, which was wonderful. Talked to H briefly on the phone, but he had a customer come in, so he said I could call back. I cleaned out my car, blew bubbles outside with my S, took the car to the carwash to get it vacuumed, made dinner, read some in my book, worked on homework, and had a wonderful chat with April! (Thanks!) Anyway, I got busy and never called H back. I went to sleep and actually slept pretty well.

Saturday:
I slept pretty late - well, sort of slept with S climbing in with me about 7:30 and crawling all over me and the bed for most of the morning, keeping up a running chatter with me, his cars, his stuffed animals, the walls, etc - it was cute but tough to sleep. We dozed on and off.

Then we got up and I wiped down the bathroom and took a shower. I actually curled my hair and did my makeup - I love how girly it makes me feel when I take some extra time with how I look. I called H around 2pm to ask if I could pick up a textbook on my way out of town to visit my mom - he had borrowed it this week. He said sure, then called back a bit later and asked if I wanted to have pizza with him at the shop - I was pretty delighted, but accepted without going "woohoo!" (it was pretty neat to get an invitation like that, though). So we went and had pizza and I played a little Grand Theft Auto - Vice City - I am terrible at it, but had fun. Then H came back to our house to shower and get some clothes - I got lots of hugs and flirting, so that was fun. I drove him back to his place and headed to my mom's to help her do some packing for the big move-out. We mostly socialized, then we had dinner, and just relaxed together. We both got tired around 9pm, so I headed home with S and tucked him into bed shortly after we got there - I did some more homework, ran a bath with some pretty-smelling bath salts, and read some more of my book.

Now I am sitting here updating my weekend on the bb, typing "now I am sitting here..." lol

Karen, seriously - talk about a million dollar idea! Hey, there isn't a group that quite fits my needs, so why not START ONE? Talk about a DUH!!! I will have so much fun on the planning alone of that project!!!

I plan on heading right over to Sage's thread and asking her about "Itchy Butt Syndrome." I have seen it twice now int he last week on the BB, and it is time I knew what it was!
Thanks, you guys,
Myrrh

One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.