I am pretty depressed today. This weekend my son ripped apart his dad's wallet that he left here, and the phone number of Dustin's lawyer friend fell out - that's new. I, of course, didn't keep my mouth shut like I should have. I was reading my journal from right before H's last OW, and realizing that he was trying to get me out of the house and away from him, and I just didn't get the message.
He isn't doing that now - the apt was re-rented due to lack of money on my part, but my fears are HUGE. I think a divorce is definitely in my future - he is selling his 1962 Cadillac Hearse, and will be filing for bankruptcy, and paying for summer classes for him and to work on his 300GT. Once that bankruptcy is out of the way, there is nothing standing between him and this divorce.
He still wants to do this counseling, and still tries to spend time with me, be nice to me, etc. I don't know what to expect and I am afraid. The sad thing is, I know I will survive once the papers are filed - it's just something I don't want to have happen.
AUGH! Having a not-so-good day today...but so far haven't said anything to him - no IM, phone calls, etc. Myrrh
One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.
