Quote: Welcome back to the reality of her choice, Mike.
Okay, let's see if we can break this down a bit, PM-style...
Quote: Either she doesn't know what I want/need or she knows and chooses to not meet even my non-sexual needs.
Okay, maybe. But maybe it's because she's inventing her OWN choice, based on what she'd PREFER to choose (meeting her own needs at the expense of yours). My guess is, she's choosing this over confronting the real issues, because it seems "safe". As long as you don't PRESENT her with a two-choice dilemma (either by laying it out for her, or by changing YOURSELF in ways that FORCE her to choose), she's free to continue dodging the issue.
Quote: There's no talk I can have with her that will make a difference. She already knows what she needs to know.
Or maybe not. What she "knows" is that you'll continue to accept the status quo. Oh, maybe you'll get snippy once in a while, but you won't really leave her or anything. Therefore, if she can put up with your occasional tantrums, she won't see any reason for real or lasting change in HERSELF.
Quote: I have the same responsibility to love her whether I'm getting anything out of it or not. But it sure would be easier to do if I was.
True, you do have a responsibility to HER, but you also have a responsibility to YOURSELF (your integrity). As long as you're willing to sell yourself out, she'll be willing to let you. Also, SHE has a responsibility to YOU. If you never call her on it, though, don't expect her to spontaneously realize this.
