Okay, now you've brought some helpful tidbits to the surface and I'm going to be asking some questions.
What would happen if you were to drop the rope and take on those family activities without inviting him along? In other words, to act AS IF you are content with taking responsbility for yourself and the kids and see how the pendulum will swing?
It seems as though he is still feeling resentful. If that is true, what do you think are the causes for this?
Just something to consider...
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsey 
