I know your pride took a big hit on this one, but how you handle things now could make all the difference in the world. I think if you can be there for her and help her through this, she is likely to see what she almost gave up.
Know it's not fair, but I think this has to be about her for a while. I think consoling her and listening to her is DBing.
I would suggest getting the book "After the Affair" for you, but I wouldn't bring up your feelings of betrayal right now. Later, I think it would be very appropriate, but not now.
