Wishing, I think you have a point that H doesn't want to dissapoint your son. I saw my H become a more attentive father when he was contemplating moving on. He also made an effort to reconnect with his kids from his first marriage. Maybe he thinks hanging on until S is 16 is the magic ticket. I think you a fully justified to ask for a choice, but that will put you in the role of the "bad" guy. Most important is that you take care of you, and not let resentment build.
