I'm so sorry about what you're going through. Please take the time to really take care of yourself right now. Let everything and everyone else take care of themselves for a little while.
Remember, you'll be OK no matter what happens. It's good that you have D18 there for you. Take things slow and ask H for whatever time you need.
I never separated but many others with more experience have said that sometimes it helps the situation. My H's therapist told him that sometimes you have to separate to know what you're doing.
