I'm sorry to hear things are so difficult. It sounds to me as if your H is still very conflicted about what he wants. I'm thinking that it can still count as a positive that the response from your H was silence rather than a negative. That tells me he doesn't know the answer.
You've told him what you want, so now it's time to really drop the rope and proceed as if you're just not thinking about it anymore. My H only started to relax when he realized (falsely of course) that I wasn't focusing on him or the R at all. I turned almost all of my focus onto myself and what changes I needed to make in my thinking and behavior regardless of what happened in the end. I always acted as if I was unconcerned about his activities, and the fact they didn't include me.
