My home life was the same. No one gave any praise or compliments so when I get them I just sort of discount them. Same thing with gifts - they are just not a big deal in my family. But when I finally figured it out, I think this made a huge difference to my H. I was pretty amazed at the response - and the gifts have been one of the few times I had any kisses from H in the last 7 mos.
It did take me quite a while to figure out my H's LL's, because they didn't make any sense to me. At first I just overlooked them, so sure they were not the ones. But after a little experimentation, and thinking about other instances, I finally got it right. They still don't make sense to me, but I'm not going to argue with the results. Now if only I could get H to read the book and be motivated to figure out what mine is.
The praise and compliments - you have to look for your opportunities so it doesn't sound phony. I usually look for opportunities when other people are around to also 'brag' about something H has done, even if it's just working a lot of overtime or a long bike trip. It didn't come naturally at first, but it's easy now.
