My friend doesn't pressure me too much - she knows what I'm doing - but she just wants to make sure I'm not planning on doing it forever. Last night she wanted to make sure I had some kind of limit on the amount of time I'm going to give this. She even asked about one of my worst fears - what if he is OK with the way it is and that's as much as he wants (separate bedrooms). She felt much better when I said that was not an option for me. She's pretty supportive and knows that I want to be able to say that I gave it all I could, even if it doesn't work out.
I'm willing to work on this until I can't do it any more, but I'm not planning on settling for a marriage with no intimacy. Jeez, I hope that's not what he's thinking - he is a LD spouse, but even he can't think that will fly! In fact, before his bomb, I had many a thought about becoming a WAW because of his behavior coupled with the lack of intimacy. He was pretty quiet when I told him once that I understood that he wanted to leave because I had thought about leaving several times myself (wow - validating and pay back at the same time!).
So, I'm rolling along, up and down. It looks as if H's friend never moved into apt this summer but I'm not asking about it. H did call to say he was stopping there last night on his way home to check to see if there was any mail (let's hope he was talking junk mail), was wondering if he had the right set of keys. I did check the apt out once about two months ago and found no personal items of H's (yes, I did check the bathroom cabinets ) and I'm pretty sure he hasn't been there in between, especially if he didn't even know if he had the right keys.
So I'm still in the cautiously optomistic mode and trying to not take anything for granted. It may be my imagination but I think he may be checking me out a little more lately. Everyone else says I'm looking good, so maybe he thinks so also.
) and I'm pretty sure he hasn't been there in between, especially if he didn't even know if he had the right keys.