I have noticed that H is attempting to connect more with guy friends and do more things out and about, but it's the typical "no personal stuff" male bonding.
H does have opportunities to talk about his feelings and "stuff". He has a therapist that he sees once a week to work on step work, and I know he has discussed our sitch with some AA people/sponsor. In fact, at Xmas dinner at his sponsor's (all AA people), I have to assume they all knew that H wanted to leave me. Great, huh? But, as usual with the AA crowd, everyone was very warm and friendly so it wasn't really awkward.
I don't think H dated a whole lot and SIL says he didn't also. He was 38 when we got married, and I was 33, first for both. I always figured that we both waited so long that this would never happen to us.
I think this is all part of the change into someone completely different that they were before. My H was the least vain person I knew before this. I was totally freaked when I realized that he was considering cosmetic surgery. I can't imagine anything more out of character for him.
The potential OW is the scariest part - before I would have said I trust him completely. But, now, I don't know.
