G, You are doing great. What an odd conversation. It seems like your wife is very paranoid.
I am so glad you spent the night listening to D18. Feeling seen is important for all human kind per almost every therapist you speak to.
I will disagree slightly with DNJ in regards to people can't make us feel any way. That might be true as adults but not children which D18 was when your XW lost her way. Even now her brain is still developing. Unfortunately as children - we see our parents as the "truth". Their opinions and actions shape who we turn into. Our young brain isn't mature enough to go "hey.. my parent has no power over me here".
You know the way XW left was not ideal. How she is handling her life... is far from responsible. This has an effect on your kids all differently and can change throughout their life times. Stay the course friend - you are doing fine.
If XW gives D18 the car - so be it. You could always teach her how to trade it in and get something of her own. Turn it into an adulting opportunity for her to choose herself and go for a car that makes her happy.
M(f): 43 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
