DnJ thanks for the reminder that mars and venus are different. Somehow, I lose sight of this. You and Grok kindly remind me. Something I need to really learn rather than passively hear and forget.
Like everything else in this new version of you...it takes time and effort to embed into your thoughts, behaviors, habits... The same for me. You hit it right though. That is what I see in what you wrote about S. Those Mars/Venus books I find very good at putting deeper concepts into everyman/woman accessible language. So, some modified cut/paste of the concepts I think apply to what you see from S.
A young man where ... On Mars, competence and personal ability are highly valued, so they are driven towards success and accomplishment.
On solving problems - on their own gives men a feeling of confidence, strength, and self-esteem, so they resist asking for help as a sign of weakness. She may ask lots of questions about what is wrong or what is bothering him. That is exactly how she would want to be supported. However, Martians feel she doesn’t trust him to solve the problem himself. On the flip side, if he asks for help or your take this means he respects, trusts and treasures your involvement. High Praise! (even if he doesn't take the advice in the end)
On distance -
Men may become distant thinking about a problem or say “I’m fine” when clearly not. That disconnect doesn’t mean they don’t care or love her, but they want to solve the problem on their own, rather than burden others with it.
Men Are Like Rubber Bands: men periodically need to withdraw to renew themselves. This natural cycle should be respected to maintain balance in relationships. Men require periodic withdrawal to recharge.
When faced with stress or challenges, men and women have different coping mechanisms. Men tend to withdraw into their “cave,” a metaphorical space where they can process their feelings and thoughts.
Men often offer solutions when women simply want to be heard, while women may offer unsolicited advice when men need space to solve problems on their own
Addendum. For women: Learn to ask directly for what you need or clarify instead of hinting. Annoying and crude as it may seem to Venus, that is saying it in HIS language.
Also, Congrats on a spot bonus! Keep on and Shine like the sun.
g
Shine - Stick Figure
Time stands still, but the clock keeps spinning I close my eyes and get lost for a minute The words and the tears, they have long dried up I think I thought that I'd had enough Shine on like the sun Holding on to a feeling Shine on everyone Find love to believe in
H:55 XW:50 D19, D18, S13 ILYBINILWY 3/23 DB1 4/23, rescinded 5/23, DB2 6/23 ("I can't do this, I Love HIM") Legal Mediation 1-5 & W leaves 8/23 – 3/24 Settlement 5/24, Court 9/11/24 <-, D 9/16/24
