You "cleared the air" and now you need to stick to your guns on what you will and will not do. Do not make any more promises or say that you are leaving, etc. Stay in the home and in your own bed. She is the one that wants out, so let her get a good taste of what will be.
These crisis people think that they can dictate to us what we are going to do. They like to flex their muscles and try to get us to do everything they want. That is not the way it works. She is going to bait you into conversations and arguments. You do not take that bait. You do not need to justify what you are doing just as long as your children are ok and you are being the best dad out there. She is using the children to try to get you to do what she wants. Right now, they are pawns for her to use against you. Stand firm! No more discussions unless there is an emergency, or it is directly related to the children and/or finances. Silence is golden.
One more thing, do not respond back to her too quickly. If you wait for a couple of hours or even a day or so....no harm. You are a busy man and have priorities that need to be addressed, and you will respond when you have time.
Do not waffle on what you will or will not do. Take a huge breath because this is a marathon, not a sprint and she will test you over and over again. Do not take her bait!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
