Grief and Gratitude, Grok - (A) Rise

[grok]

...down one dog

Well, little dog with cancer finally met his end on Monday… Peeing on his bedding I washed every day. I consulted with the children and D17 didn’t want to put him down so long as he wasn’t in pain or loosing his mind.

I was teleworking Monday. Made eggs and bacon for the kids before they woke at S13’s request. Figured out D19 didn’t have work until 10:30. OH! There is a gap here where all three kids are home together with me right now! Let’s go get our Christmas Tree! Off we went, after waking D19 (grumpy and moody after being woken with a 10 minute deadline…). We all enjoyed the hour, going and playing music, picking an eight foot White Pine, discussing where in the living room we will put it this year. Big dog’s crate got moved for it…he was so confused! LOL!

I had put the little dog outside in the sun for the afternoon like he enjoyed. In the evening it was time to go take S13 to his scout like troop…though I had little spare time to squeeze in the full work day and all the over activities. In a rush out to my vehicle, I remembered little dog outside at the last moment and rushed back to bring him inside. He had fallen asleep in the sun outside in the back yard and never woke up. About a good a way as he could go. He hadn’t been eating much at all the last week. He couldn’t walk.

I put the body in the garage and pondered… when to tell each child? How? D19 is at work. D17 is at gymnastics. I’m taking S13 to his troop meeting.

I decided to try and wait until we got back.

While at the troop meeting I get messages from D19, ”Where is little dog?!!!!”

OK, well, she will take it the best. So, I just told her…. And that I hadn’t told her siblings yet. D19 immediately grasped the dilemma. Since she was going to pick D17 up from gymnastics (XW said she couldn’t that night, please someone pick her up) and volunteered to delay D17 coming home so I could tell them together. ”I’ll take D17 out for a Boba or some other treat to delay her.”.

D19 ended up getting chicken nuggets and French fries for all. But had to tell D17 on the way home. I told S13 when we got home. Hugs to D17 and S13 ran off for a couple minutes. None wanted to go see the body.

"Why are you here?"

Around 9p, our two remaining dogs, big and little, got anxious around the door. I had an idea of what was going on and saw XW’s outline through the door window. I just unlocked the door and opened it while continuing on about my evening business. She came in the door looking around for the kids. D17 was on the couch looking at her.

D17, ”Why are you here?”[/]
XW, [I]”to give hugs…
D17, ”NO, I mean WHY are you IN THE HOUSE?”
XW tentatively, ”… I can go back outside if you want … I’ll wait in the car?”
…
XW, ”D19 messaged it might be good if I came in tonight.”
D17, ” … no …”

S13 got 10 minutes of hugs from mom.

D17, D19, …. Some minutes and then went their own way.

I didn’t take part. I busied myself with other things needing doing. This is between her and them.

My consoling and advice for them was before and in the hours over the next day.

g

—written at the campfire tonight on my laptop … one night campout with S13 and wreath laying tomorrow at the National Cemetery—

*Wreaths Across America*