Grief and Gratitude, Grok - Shifting

[grok]

holding it together

D17 came over to me yesterday (not to mom? hmmm) to talk about her hair...and school pictures...and curls made by braids. The discussion moved into what hair styles I and my sisters had as kids. Ah Ha! I have pictures. And so I brought out a box of prints, sorry D17, no digital cameras yet! 80's hair styles. Clothes. I've had hair down to my waist for a few years ... Just to try it out. LOL.

D17, "hey! those are envelopes from Target. enough from "Payless" Show me those"

Sure...Adventures at Lake Powell, motorcycles, etc... pictures of XW. and me. 20 years ago having adventures. the hair and clothes 🙂

I kept it together and showed her.

then ... had to be alone for a while

more things to put away ... sealed ... marked don't open until you know

it all ties together

Listening to random from my entire Plex server this morning -

Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain by Willie Nelson

Love is like a dying ember
And only memories remain
And through the ages I'll remember
Blue eyes crying in the rain

Some day when we meet up yonder
We'll stroll hand-in-hand again
In a land that knows no parting
Blue eyes crying in the rain

Except...it is MY eyes that are blue.

So. This morning I PRAY

Wartime Prayers by Paul Simon

Times are hard, it's a hard time
But everybody knows all about hard times
The thing is, what are you going to do?
Will you cry?
And try to muscle through?
And try to rearrange your stuff?
But when the wounds are deep enough
And it's all that we can bear
We wrap ourselves in prayer

Because you cannot walk with the holy
If you're just a halfway decent man
But I don't pretend that I'm a mastermind
With a genius marketing plan
I'm trying to tap into some wisdom
Even a little drop would do
I want to rid my heart of envy
And cleanse my soul of rage
Before I'm through

g

afterthought
I pray for the day soon when I feel I can select a new name for my series of posts...my set of folders for all the documents in this tragedy...my collected bookmarks. I don't think I've ever said. Internally I have them all in folders named

NULL

Latin ne=not ullus=any ... emptiness ... the void