Grief and Gratitude, Grok - Shifting

[grok]

It's about how it feels

10:20pm Dogs walked and in bed. Last snacks for S12, "but I'm hungry, dad." S12 and D17 have lunches packed for tomorrow's homeschool coop. D19 at a friends for a sleepover. Lights almost all out.

D17 bounces down the stairs, "Dad! Dad! Does this look OK?!" She poses in loose ripped jeans, light brown woven belt, turquoise ribbed wide shouldered tank top. Skin colored bra strap pokes out from under on one side.

I pause and consider the ensemble. Is it OK for a homeschool coop? Tasteful, exposure minimal, colors coordinate and balance, her favored gold earrings will match.

"Yes D17, it is OK for tomorrow."

D17 rolls her eyes. "Yeah, Yeah, but is it CUTE?!"

Ah! After all my poking around this last year on the nature of female feelings and rules of attraction I understand instantly. (grok)

"Yes D17, it IS cute." For it is a cute outfit.

I've learned to rate and validate the cuteness or the level or "feels" clothes and other things bring to D17 and D19.

I have a variety of feelings (grief and gratitude) - that Dad is the one they come to and ask. I ponder - that girls use their father to measure future men in their lives. It feels weighty, and light weight at the same time.

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