I'm gonna need a few days to think abt what it is that I want, besides my husband back.
I do understand and empathize with wanting one’s spouse back. Unfortunately, that is beyond your direct control.
Remember, two paths here. Healing and business. Be businesslike when dealing with business matters. Treat divorce as a business deal gone sideways.
I suspect your legal default position is half of everything. That is a starting point as almost everything is negotiable. (Your L will know your locale’s specifics as to what can and cannot be negotiated. As an example, in my locale, child support cannot be waived or altered.)
Often the spouse that wants out will be more generous with their negotiating. That generosity doesn’t last forever. It may serve you best to accept H’s (if he indeed does offer) greasing of the wheels.
Originally Posted by Whatlee
I received his response to my response filed almost a year ago. H still doesn't want to give me spousal support, after 32yrs of marriage he thinks I deserve nothing.
Originally Posted by Whatlee
His atty wants to know what it is that I want. It's almost like he doesn't even care what he has to do, he just wants out.
It looks pretty obvious that H spoke with his attorney and found out that he cannot just up and leave you with nothing. To me, his L is trying to get a less than 50% answer (offer) from you and then latch on to it. Be careful! Have all correspondence go through your lawyer. Remember, business.
You had your lawyer remove her gloves, so let her do her stuff.
Spousal support, half the house, half the accounts, half the pensions, etc. Do not get swindled, you have a lot of life left and need to fund it. Even if you and H get back together.
Consider your options carefully and fully. (For example, you could let H buy your portion of the house, or let H retain some accounts for his portion of the house. Or you could sell the house and spilt the proceeds. Likewise for pensions and such.) Just because H is desperate and in a rush, you need not be. Be rational and logical! Keep emotions out of these financial decisions.
Give H to God. Focus on you and your life.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
