Hi Whatlee - I'm catching up today on everyone's stories. I see your H his moving towards D. I like what job noted - OW is putting pressure on H to D. H feels obligated to accommodate OW request (there may be an ultimatum thrown in there by OW). When I reflect on my H, it's a life of accommodation that has contributed to him seeking himself and the happiness his true self would bring him. He accommodated the controls/demands from parents and quickly transitioned to accommodate me/our relationship for 30 years. I saw his responses as empathetic and compromising through the years. H saw it as accommodation and not being his true self.

As you said, you are plenty more prepared than you were a year ago for the D. And a D doesn't translate to your R being over. It's merely another attempt at happiness from a life of accommodation. And the silver lining may be that you get to move into a different home situation.

Hang in there. We're here for you.