When does this end? When does the heartache and pain go away?
I've had 2 struggle days. 2 days of being on my face praying, begging, pleading with God to just fix it, 2days where my faith is weak, 2 days where my hope is depleted, 2 days of not wanting to do this life anymore, 2 days of wondering how can someone who had such a strong relationship with God, think God is ok with this, 2 days of wondering how is it that someone who is trying to live right is the one hurting the most while the other party is just going on with his life, 2 days of wondering if the 2 years we've been apart has diminished the love he has for me, 2 days wondering has he forgotten abt me, 2 days of why aren't my boys mad at him, 2 days of wondering what is my purpose in this, 2 days of wondering will I ever have more than living in a camper and working 2 dead end jobs, 2 days of lots of tears. I almost feel like I'm back at the beginning of all this mess, with my emotions and anxiety.
Sorry just having a pity party, prob has to do with the weather and the devil. My counselor said this would b hard if I chose to stand, God didn't promise life would be easy. This us just a season and it too shall pass.
