Happy birthday! I'm so happy that you handled and planned your day as you did - even with the gifts! My big 50 is later this year and you've inspired me. TY
Timing is never good for the kiddos. My H bomb dropped for the second time in Sept of last year. This was the first the kids learned - BD1 was kept from them quite easily as H was not monstering nor running. Anyway, I can tell you that I agree with DnJ on timing. It may be best to allow them to process, grieve, release emotions before going to school. In my sitch, S had just graduated from the university and had a really hard time the first 4 months of employment, making it difficult for a positive first impression - he's mostly recovered and doing well. D was beginning a semester at the university and couldn't concentrate, breath, eat. She missed assignments, classes, sleep, etc. Some of it is D's personality but I guess I'm saying we just don't know how they'll respond to such information/news. D enrolled in therapy and is still medicating for her anxiety despite it being nearly a year.
It'll be hard on them either way - we know this. {{{Hugs}}} I recommend that you and H give them the comfort of home (rather than a dorm and roommate) to express themselves in private and with you, as they wish.
And as for the withdrawal - ugh. L talks aren't fun but good to be informed and aware.
My big 50 is later this year and you've inspired me. TY 
