So things are moving along. WW continues to be unreliable, made a committment to be here this saturday to help box up things and separate what we have to get rid of and pick what she needs to keep. I am only looking to keep my own possessions, as in collectibles, books, my computer and my clothing and such, I have offered her everything else, I want to do a full cleanse of anything that we owned together. She then tells me she has plans this satuday, not surprising to me at all, when she falls head over heels with one of the OMs its her typical pattern, which is why things have taken longer than necessary to resolve. The more i see this the more i feel the nudge to push forward with a completely new life. I handed in my long term leave (5 years) form at work and it was approved, i moved 5 weeks i had of vacation that i will tack into the 5 weeks preceding the closing of the home. Next week I am going to renew my passport and once i have it ready I will book my one way ticket back to my home country, i have already began making provisions for when i get there. I now have the time to take care of clearing the home, shipping some clothing and things i will need, giving things that are mine away to people that I know, people that have supported me through this time and were there for me when I was in a dark place. While this gives me some clarity and gives me set dates, it is a hard pill to swallow. My heart is torn but my mind is pushing me forward into starting a new life and leaving all of my old baggage behind.
I dont think she fulls understands that i will no longer be in her life in any form whatsoever, 5000km away, new phone number, no address to find me. She has taken for granted my presence in her life while she lives her narcissistic ego driven existence. But that is all coming to an end soon and a new chapter of my life shall start.
