Why are you apologizing to someone who is having an EA on you (and your kids)?
Why are you engaging her at all?
Give yourself grace because little of this feels intuitive or natural when you are LBS.
When she says she wants to separate -- Yeah W. This situation does not work for me et all, either. I am making plans and moving ahead accordingly.
If she asks what ? I'm checking with a lawyer about my rights and options, I am separating my finances from yours, and I am going to see X, Y and Z for Easter with the kids.
Do not under any circumstances base your actions on her reactions or what you believe will be her reactions to your actions. That is controlling, manipulative, and co-dependent. If she acts cold or angry or whatever at you, so be it. Hear what she says, and validate her feelings. But do not be influenced or subordinate to them.
Don't tip toe or walk on eggshells or worry about the reaction of someone who is trampling all over your marriage by having an affair.
What are you trying to "achieve"? I still keep reading about she and her. Your goal and focus should be to save, protect, and better yourself and your kids from her boundary violations.
Paraphrasing her, what do you want out of your life? To be with someone who does not value you and your efforts for your family?
What would she need to do to in order to have a chance at another relationship with you?
Me-53 W-49 D22,D18,D15 T-Since-12/2001 Married-9/2004 She Moved Out-5/28/2010 Piecing start-04/2011 Now-together Thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2079304
