I think the problem here is that you don't want a divorce but feel like you have no choice but to divorce.
The truth of the matter is when a woman loses attraction for a man it rarely returns.
Correct. My view is that I had two options in my sitch: rip off the band aid now and get divorced, or continue living in a dead marriage while working on myself and getting ready to leave. After ~2 years of working on myself while subsidizing a WW, I decided I am no longer willing to live this way. I'm ready-ish, and that's good enough. I've had enough time to realize W is permanently checked out and remaining married is the wrong thing to do. It's the decision I made and I am at peace with it. Most days all it takes is a reminder of the litany of ways W had disrespected me in order to feel confident in my decision, but yesterday I slipped up.
Originally Posted by Boat14
Realize right now that it is going to take a really long time to uncouple yourself with her and a really long time before you are ready to date and a really long time before you find someone that fits into your new world.
Yet another reason why I am eager to get going.
Originally Posted by Boat14
Are you in your best shape physically? Have you learned what women want in a man? Have you figured out your purpose?
Yes to being in shape, and signed up for a spartan race and triathlon this summer. Yes to understanding attraction, and still studying it daily. Happy in my career and a high earner, but looking for a deeper purpose that truly drives me to the point where it has my whole focus aside from the kids.
Originally Posted by Boat14
I promise you if you master these things you will find what you are looking for in life. If not, you may be still here ten years later complaining about what your wife is still doing to you and your family.
I refuse to be Angry Divorced Guy, which is why I still post here despite no longer trying to bust a D. Thanks Boat.
