So an update. I spoke to her the other day at a coffee shop after mediation. I was in purely read between the lines mode, I saw her looking at a family with children and saw that she still is going through the problem of inability to have children. She mentioned to me she still harbors resentment towards me but doesn't know why. She said she's no longer with OM, I didn't ask directly, just said I don't want to be in an open marriage. I checked her Instagram and it turns out she's been blocked by him now. It feels like her resentment is from inability to blame anyone but herself for why her life is going the way it is going. Now she wants to buy time to see if she can buy me out, I know it's highly unlikely as for the amount she needs even with both our incomes we'd have a hard time getting approved. I see this as her buying time, I'm willing to give it to her as if house listing is delayed till April we should get more on the market anyways. It's annoying because the two friends she talked most about everything they both messed up their marriages and harbor endless resentment towards their exes and it feels like she's following in the blame everyone else strategy. I'm beginning to become indifferent and seeing this continued behaviour is giving me a clear indication that she has not learned yet from any of her choices. I find it very likely she's probably looking for the next target of "passion" to fill in the void inside of her. The only positive sign I took from her was her saying she agrees with me that happiness is something one finds within oneself, but otherwise she seems very bitter and resentful towards me, a lot of that likely because the OM didn't go as she expected but as I predicted.
I'm starting to get to the point where I am feeling a lot better about myself and my future and I honestly don't think I can even consider any olive branch towards her if I don't see radical change, otherwise her same feelings towards me will surface again into impulsive behaviour
