I don't think I could give her this feeling ATM tbh, she still seems to be in a withdrawal type mode and until recently she was sending soulmate posts to him, she's still ironically in the mode where she thinks soul mates should fight for each other and not give up. So I don't want to give her any emotional or sexual vibes because she stills sees the so called problems we had. She actually came over last night to drop off our cats and she offered to help me clean the house on Sunday to prepare it for listing the following week, I did not ask her and she offered willingly. I do not want to give off the vibe that I still want her, I want her to chase me and to show her what type of man she is losing. I was calm throughout our brief conversation and she noticed my demeanor and physical appearance. She cried to me about everything and reiterated she never meant to hurt me. She said the most hurtful thing was me telling her a few days before that I don't think we should remain friends after this, as I had told her she has someone now to confide in and I don't want to be in this picture. She replied by saying she's not with anyone and that they don't talk anymore, although from the messages while it seems they broke up last last year, her messages still show she's still in communication. I'm focusing on myself but by doing so, I'm showing her the best side of me and what she's possibly losing.
I'm still in the mindset that if anything was to ever happen, I would need her to show she has really changed, I'm not getting that sense yet. But I feel mediation which starts tomorrow needs to proceed as well as house. Divorce is more final and permanent but that is only after legal separation. I feel like our home has lost any significance to our lives and it's likely best to rid ourselves of it. I'm carrying on with the plan as I see is best for me but I am not waiting or expecting anything from her part of things, as she still brought up things she found gave her excuses to seek out other men. I have none of that, I acknowledge I wasn't perfect and it was a hard year but I think she needs to continue seeing what she's losing and the best version of me is what I want her to see.