Act III (3)

[Sunflyer]

Well, I hit a pothole this past weekend.

I posted a little while back about keeping my phone tracking off while I am out GALing. I don't share my phone location with W, but I do with my son, and I was concerned about her using him to pry into what I am doing. (I am not dating, not seeing anyone else). W claims that it creates anxiety in our son if he can't know where I am when I am out.

Based on advice, I decided to turn the tracking on and keep it on.

It only took two weeks of this before it blew up.

Saturday, I had planned a nice night out for myself (dinner followed by an audience participation improv session. I have never tried improv before, but it looks like fun). I went out to eat first, and upon leaving the restaurant, sure enough there's W's car parked two rows behind mine in the lot. I walked past it and saw her head peeking out from under the dashboard. I walked back toward the restaurant and called my family confidant to tell her that W was following me.

W confronted me outside while I was still on the phone, convinced that I was talking to some woman that I must be involved with. I ended the conversation quickly, and she proceeded to tell me that I should tell her "in the name of honesty" if I was going to meet someone. Yes, the woman who has had two APs in the last year and has volunteered no information about them, who has had one of them (at least) in our house while I was at work, who has introduced her whole family and our sons to the current one behind my back, is suggesting that I am not being honest enough. The woman who has said that she doesn't care about where I am, now uses our son's phone to get the location and then drives there to confront me.

I didn't get into a fight, but I didn't tell her what my plans were either. I do not feel accountable to her in this regard.

I am thoroughly expecting that W will probably have me tailed by a PI next.

I did go on with the rest of my evening. I enjoyed it as best I could, but kept thinking about this crap the whole time.

I spoke to son the next day. He asked me if I was dating someone and said, "Dad, I just want you to be happy." I told him that for now, my private time is my own, and I asked him to respect that. I also have asked him to come to me directly if he has issues he wants to talk about.

Predictably, on Monday W came to me (either son told her about what I said or she pried him for the info) and continued to argue that anything that prevents me from being open about where I am is "causing him (son) harm and fueling his anxiety." She also tried to justify her following me on Saturday by pointing out that I had tracked her location one day last fall. (This is true and would have been when her current relationship was first heating up. She was coming home later than usual and hadn't told me that she would. Her phone tracking showed her at unusual places for lengthy periods of time. A day or two later, she cut off sharing her phone location with me entirely, and I did the same).

I honestly think that if my son needs to contact me, text or call should be sufficient. Having him track my exact location is just going to perpetuate this behavior from W, which I found highly upsetting, bordering on disturbing.