Aphexx sorry you're dealing with all of this. However, I'm afraid you are borderline suicidal. Please please please contact a suicide prevention line if you start having worse feelings along those lines.
You left out some details. This is your second marriage.. How many times has your walk away been married? How did that/those marriages end?
How did you two meet? Please feel in as much detail as you possibly can do we can help and assess.
Please be aware, the likelihood of an affair is really high. The pattern is there. So brace yourself.
yes i have started going to a councilor. my current wife was married once before and she had 2 kids with him and pretty much did the same thing to him that she did to me. the only difference is that she was with him for 12 yrs. i later found out that she wanted a divorce from him after 5 yrs but he got cancer and she didnt want to divorce him during that then his mom died after that so she waited another 2 yrs to say she wanted a divorce he doesnt believe in divorce so she felt like she had to cheat on him to force his hand. that was a flag there because you cant make someone stay married to you. i later found out by accident that she had been cheating on him for half of the marriage.
we met online she had been divorced for 6 months. we had a 10 hr first date and really connected quick. i moved in with her after 4 months we got engaged after 6 months. we had a bit of a dynamic between us im a anxious preoccupied love attachment style while she is a dismissive avoidant or a disorganized attachment in not sure which. she would become very distant and i would chase and then i would get frustrated and back off and she would chase. she tried to break things off 2 months after we got engaged. i talked her out of it and didnt put anymore pressure to get married anymore. she came to me after 2 yrs and told me she was ready to get married. she has clinical depression so she would get in a funk for about 1 month at a time every couple of months. yes the pattern is there and i know shes talking to a guy she met online but they havent gone out yet. she also has been getting backups online in case this guy doesnt work out. she can be very selfish and immature and shes not in reality right now.
