My wife and and i have been together for 5 yrs and married for 2 yrs. i am 52 and she is 43. she blindsided me last Thursday saying she is filling for divorce. wants no counselling and said nothing i do or say will change her mind. i felt something was off 2 months ago but every time i would question her she said we were fine and said it was just her depression. she was still having sex with me even 3 days before the bombshell. she would act sweet and kind the day before and wrote me a nice birthday card last november saying how happy she was and what a great life we had. at the start of our relationship i told her that 2 other women blindsided me the first one being my first wife who acted like everything was fine and i caught her cheating on me right after christmas. the 2nd girl i was engaged to wrote me a text saying how much she loved me and couldnt wait to marry me then 3 hrs later broke up with me through email. i begged my wife to please communicate any issues and not blindside me like they did. she promised she would talk to me and go to counselling if things got bad. i made the mistake of not maintaining my friendships during our marriage and i put all my time into my wife and kids. i only have my 88yr old mom left who is in bad health and my 10 yr old daughter left. my daughter is from another relationship. my daughter and stepdaughter are super close to me and each other. this is going to crush them. my wife doesnt seem to care her mind is made up. i feel so alone and isolated. i am in agony and the only thing keeping me going is my daughter. i will not leave her without a father.
to make things worse i have been on long term disability and only make 60% of my jobs salary. i feel like i cant afford to live now and i need major back surgery. i suffer from a panic disorder and anxiety. my wife has major depression. i dont want to die but i dont want to be alive. i am so afraid its going to be too much to handle.
