Hi all. Hope everyone is doing as well as possible.
As a quick recap, the D paperwork W had prepped was set to expire next week if I wasn't served. I knew that could lead to 1) being served 2) not being served and 3) not being served with the potential to be served further down the road. W asked to talk and let tearfully let me know that she chose to move forward with the D. I said I understood and repeated something one of the DB counselors taught me ~5 years ago "To me, divorce isn't the solution to our problems. However, I love and respect you enough to let go".
Overall, I feel relief. I'm still at peace with either path (D or not D with my boundaries and requirements being actively addressed. I've done too much work to settle for less).
I know that being served isn't the end and there is a lot of time before a judge bangs a gavel down and declares the marriage officially done. I've got plans tomorrow with friends from high school. I'm watching the NCAA football championship with other friends.
Most of my property is pre-marital so, thanks to my L, I have a good sense of how those chips will fall if the D becomes final. In some ways, being better prepared for a D makes the other half of DBing easier for me. I continue to focus on me and D13, remain aloof and positive when around W, and am glad for the support of this community. I can see W is struggling and sad. While I wish I could say and do more, I'm even more fired now than I was a day ago. I can offer the support I'd offer a friend if they ask. Otherwise, W is getting lots more time and space.
As always, thanks, each of you, for being along (virtually) for the ride. It helps!
