Maturin - My Story (2)

[Sunflyer]

I feel the distance between us growing. There were a few moments of affection from her over the weekend but they felt like temp checking as oppose to genuine desire. The DR process has helped me accept that the W I once knew is gone and may never come back and I can tell you that this version of her is not welcome in my life. I know patience is required and I know things get worse before they get better but it's very lonely to be constrained by a marriage that provides none of the benefits of a relationship. We had previously agreed to table all divorce discussion until after the holidays. Now that they're ending I have some decisions to make about next steps.

I relate to a lot of your story (except for the drunken behavior she displays). My W has already filed for divorce, and I didn't want it at the beginning, but there's really nothing here for me anymore. I'm lonely as well (and this started long before BD and me finding out about her APs, as she deprioritized me more and more in favor of her two jobs). This is ironic because she was the one who complained about being ignored but couldn't see how she also contributed to the disconnection.

My hobbies and GAL are helping quite a bit though.