I think the mistake most people make is to stop what got them to piecing. You never stop GAL, self-improving, or being healthily emotionally detached. DBing becomes your lifestyle, it isn't something you do temporarily just to avoid the divorce. People that do that end up getting another BD at some point.
After several false starts in the last couple years this line really speaks to me. I can now look back on the years leading up to my W's PA and see that I was codependent and placing unrealistic expectations on the MR. Steve, what has been your process for making sure you don't backslide? Have there been moments when you realized you were slipping back into your old ways?
As a new member it's really so helpful to have you on the boards. The fact that you still stick around after all these years is so appreciated.
